Thursday, April 16, 2009

Bad Decisions

I'm mulling over the nature of bad decisions.

Some decisions you make and you immediately know they are bad for you, ultimately will end up causing you pain and hardship, cut you off from friends, and you'll regret them for a long time.

Some decisions you realize five minutes later were bad. See the above.

Sometimes you make a decision and find out months or years later you went the wrong direction, stuck with (or left) the wrong person.

There's absolutely nothing you can do about any of these decisions. You just have to live with them.

I'd like to be more specific! Tonight I decided to stick with my housemate instead of going to something I wanted to go to. He ultimately had to stay home with his sick cat. So I did that... I don't regret it now, will I regret it later? Every night we have plans that can take us in different directions. Sometimes we don't even know what we missed.

I was driving a friend home (he came over to hang out with us) and a song came on the radio, "American Music" by the Violent Femmes. This reminded me of a production I co-directed over ten years ago. The closing night party for this production, I made a few more bad decisions... Well, it's a long story. But every time I hear that song (it was the closing song for the show) I remember that production, the age I was, and a little of who I was back then. It was a tough time - but then this is a tough time too.

Where the hell is all this leading? Wouldn't I like to know.

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